There are a few things I would like to blog about, but can’t seem to get myself to sit down and type it. Why? Partly the big MIM-ALIF-LAM-SIN. Another part, I have tons of reports to type and hand in.

But as a preview, I would very much like to share about:

1. Amir Muhammad’s latest book that I had finished reading over the weekend: Yasmin Ahmad’s Films

2. Today, 2 years ago, my dad passed away. How sometimes I wish when I come through the door of my mother’s house after work, I would find my Dad in the living room, either typing on his laptop or drafting a text for a speech or book in a test pad.

3. My sister’s newly opened English Language Centre in Bandar Seri Putra. It think it’s really cozy and vibrant at the same time. I hope she will receive a lot of customers and the business will blossom.

4. My two new nephews. Muhammad Alif Akid bin Khairil-Iszuddin and Imran bin Khairil Idham.

If i have the time, will upload some pics. In the mean time, Selamat Hari Raya Aidil Adha.

Dear Lin,

It’s hard. And it gets harder.
And quite honestly, I don’t have any words of wisdom to ease the pain.
But dear, all we can do is pray for our parents that had left us.
And both of us, we have to be sabar and redha.

It’s going to be exactly two years for my family this 23rd Nov, and it doesn’t get any easier. Just keep on praying, ya.

For a while then, this song was the theme of my life. And I dedicate this song to you, may you find strength. Take care, Lin.

The storm is coming but I don’t mind
People are dying, I close my blinds

All that I know is I’m breathing now

I want to change the world
Instead I sleep
I want to believe in more than you and me

But all that I know is I’m breathing
All I can do is keep breathing
All we can do is keep breathing now

All that I know is I’m breathing
All I can do is keep breathing
All we can do is keep breathing

All we can do is keep breathing
All we can do is keep breathing
All we can do is keep breathing
All we can do is keep breathing
All we can do is keep breathing now

Ingrid Michaelson – Keep Breathing

1. Keinginan untuk mengemaskini blog ku adalah amat tinggi.. Namun, tahap kerajinan jauh menjunam.. kenapa? Nantilah ye..

2. Lamanya aku tak pegi Kedai Pak Tam.. Anyone?

3. Bilalah surat tu nak tiba? Kalau tak dapat hitam putih, secara lisan pun aku terima..

4. Berkaitan di atas, semalam masa mesyuarat aku sungguh terganggu sebab orang yang asek tanya aku dan kawan-kawan pasal analysis tools ada sama dalam mesyuarat tu. Ini mesyuarat internal je.. takde pun organisasi lain. Bila masa pulak dia ni keje kat sini. Oh my selipar Asadi! Terganggu betul aku.

5. Malasnya nak gerakkan diri untuk pandu dan balik.

6. Besok kena basuhkan kasut sekolah @fnan.. Argghh, kenapalah buat ibu macam ni???!!

1. My number (nombor badan) was the same as the one I got during my PAC41 – 102.

2. Aku masuk temuduga dengan Mohd Sani. Aku penah jadi fasilitator sebelum ni di mana interviewer aku adalah Panelnya. Not that it will give me any advantage. Dan aku sungguh tak puas hati tak dapat jawab pasal NKRA Kementerian aku.

3. I don’t think we ran 2.4km. It felt shorter.

4. Given the chance to do it all over again, I don’t think I would have done it any different. Sama je lemau.

5. I would like to quote a friend, about all the simulations we were supposed to go thru: “If you put us in a situation that is not real, how do you expect us to act in a manner that we would in reality?” Betul tak?

6. Aku benci tepuk lalat.

Today marks the 7th year of my son, my first born. That means, I’ve been a mother for exactly 7 years. Wow. What a time to reflect.

Anyway, here’s a “10 things about Afnan”.

1. Afnan loves the outdoor. That is before he discovered Cartoon Network. Actually he still does, if there is a friend or more to accompany him. He loves running, playing ball – football, basketball, hockey, swimming.
    
2. Talking about swimming, like most kids, he loves the swimming pool. He used to bathe is his basin until he was four. Even when he couldn’t fit in it anymore. He would bring in all kinds of toys into the basin. These days however, it’s a battle trying to make him bathe.
    
3. Most people say that he is a fast learner. When I took him for his first swimming lesson, his instructor didn’t believe he was only five. His nursery and kindergarten teachers said he learns fast too. And has good memory too. He would remember where things are kept even when he was only one. But, most of his teachers agree too, being a typical boy, he can be a bit malas. Maybe he finds learning too easy, he takes it for granted.
    
4. He has a soft heart. When he was about a year old, if I cried (or pretend to cry), he would cry with me. Unlike his sister who would stare at me instead.
    
5. He is ALWAYS shouting or screaming. Ever since he was a baby. I only realized this (screaming since a baby) when I watched videos of him when he was a younger.
    
6. Oh, he’s such an impatient baby. I remember that he was always wailing in the middle of the night if I was slow at making his milk, change his diaper, let his bottom cool in the air too long. He became an impatient boy too. But now at 7, he learns to wait because his mommy is such a procrastinator and so slow. Heheh.
    
7. As I mentioned once in this blog, I had his name ever since I was 16. I got his name from the surah Ar-Rahman. Which directly translated as branches. Or twigs. But the deeper meaning of the ayat, am not so sure.
    
8. Lots of people had commented that ever since he was a baby, Afnan has this twinkle in his eyes, whenever he is being photographed, that says, I am cheeky and naughty. Even looking at his picture, without meeting him, you can guess how naughty he can be. Ye ke?
    
9. Like me, Afnan can eat ice cream every day. He can even live on ice cream, if there wasn’t rice available. Before he was two, he loved vegetable. Sawi, Spinach, Cabbage. He once climbed the dining table and sneaked under the tudung saji to eat spinach. But these days, he takes his food simple. White rice and fried chicken. Only. White rice and nugget. Mee hailam, no onions, no garlic, no chilli, no chicken and no vegetable. KFC chicken, only. What he loves best these days is Maggi Kari.
    
10. He is such a scaredy cat. He won’t go upstairs alone. He won’t go to the kitchen if it’s dark. He won’t go to sleep if I didn’t come to bed with him. But he’s not afraid of people.

Happy Birthday to Muhammad Afnan Khair bin Hazly (you’ve added so much joy and kekusutan in our lives. We will always love you) and, not forgetting, Rafidah Ramli too.

Saya tgh terliur nak makan:

1. Cheese Naan
2. Roti Bakar Wholemeal kat Kluang
3. Nasi Ayam dgn Ayam Goreng Sodap
4. Nasi Tumpang Kakak SUB Aku Jual (Kat Kelantan ok)
5. Spagheti Aku Masak Sendiri

Aku tgh tunggu Puan Nurul datang nak pergi lunch. Kenapalah lambat sangat masa berlalu.

1. Sarapan pada jam 7 pagi tadi tak baca Bismillah agaknya.

2. Biasanya, time ni saya baru sarapan (untuk lima, enam hari kebelakangan ini).

3. Saya malas nak buat kerja, jadi saya nak makan.

4. Hari pertama kerja selepas 10 hari tidak bekerja, jadi saya mengada-ngada.

5. Saya mengharapkan dapat jumpa kawan masa makan. Jadi otak saya suruh perut lapar.

6. Supaya saya ada sebab nak tulis blog. Hahahahahahaahah.

Selamat Hari Raya Aidil Fitri dan Selamat Kembali Bertugas (kepada yang baru nak tengok pejabat macam saya ni) dengan gigih dan bersemangat.

… membuat saya terharu. Kenapa? Kerana…

1. Mendapat panggilan ucapan raya. Bukanlah bermakna takde orang lain yang ucapkan selamat hari raya. Ramai je. Tetapi tidak ada yang telefon (bukan sms) aku khusus nak ucapkan selamat hari raya. And just that. Semata-mata nak ucapkan selamat hari raya. Terharu saya.
Adik saya di perantauan tu mmglah sah-sah akan call. Siap buat video chat  lagi. Ini non-relative.

2. Biskut raya yg saya kirimkan ke seberang laut pun sampai jugak. Agak kecewa sebab sampainya jadi serdak. Salah sayalah bungkus entah macam mana. Tapi at least sampailah sebelum raya. Saya amat kesian sebenarnya kepada penerima, sebab sampai pun jadik serdak, baik tak payah tiba dak? Tapi sebab dia sudi juga makan, terharu saya. Dan saya jadi lebih sedih bila kawan saya bagitahu, penerima tak dapat balik Mesia nak attend pusat penilaian. Tuan penerima serdak TG, tak payahlah nak balas-balas. Saya ikhlas hantar.

3. Kawan saya di perantauan yang lain juga bagitahu dia dapat balik untuk menghadiri pusat penilaian itu. Wah, terujanya saya. Sedikit sedih tak dapat pergi pada masa yang sama, tapi dapat jumpa pun dah kira baik. Rindunya saya kat dia.

4. Saya dapat anak buah baru. Dan adik saya mungkin mempertimbangkan nama yang kami cadangkan untuk anaknya. Tak pernah pulak terfikir I would have the honour to name a person. Terharunya. Welcome to the world Akid. (tu bukan nama yang saya pilih, tp bapak dia nak panggil tu, apo nak buek).

1. How does one dispose oil (as in cooking oil) in this country?

2. Where does one get rid of old, unwanted mattress?

3. What does one do with oreo filling when one has used up all the biscuits for cheesecake crust?

4. How does one decide, when the future of another person is in one’s hand?

5. What is the answer to the current “Wake Up Your Brain” question?

 6. Is it normal to hate another person (who is working in the same office) just by looking at him/her without ever having a conversation?

1. Aku kena pegi tengok tempat ni ada komplen masuk surat khabar semalam lepas tu kena antar hari ni jugak report tu. suka nak besarkan isu kecik.

2. Dah aku kena tgk tempat tu, takde menda pun. KEtua kg tu ajak jalan sana sini. Bukan aku berkira sangat nak tgk kesusahan orang kampung dalam kawasan bandar ni, tapi hari ni mmg aku rasa tak laratnya. Nak terpitam aku rasa duk jalan-jalan bawah matahari. Kalau Tok ketua ajak pergi satu tompek laie, aku nak sound je tadi, “Tok, saya nak terpitam ni. Moh lah kito minam”.

3. Tempat aku cadang nak sewa untuk jadi pejabat kitorang, boleh tak agensi tu kata ada orang lain nak sewa. Dah lah aku dengar namanya pun, syarikat swasta, yang kurang birokrasi macam gomen ni. Hish.. dia boleh cakap, sape cepat dia dapat. Hangin aku.

4. TNT aku bulan Julai dah turun naik Bhg Kewangan ke Bhg aku sebanyak tujuh kali kot. Dah lah aku rasa kesuntukan wang nak raya ni. Wahai YAB PM, tahun ni ada bonus tak?

5. Laman web Sinar Harian apasala nak buat carian kat arkib tu lembab nak mampus takde apanya yang penah keluar kalau aku search. Kalau tak boleh nak buat carian, tak payah letak fungsi tu. Apa gunanya sekadar nak tambah tab. Ni semua yang menyusahkan aku.

6. Ha, lagi satu aku lupa. Aku ada paper yang tak bertaip lagi ni. Bencinya dengan diri aku. Kenapalah setan malas ni bertenggek. Oh, bulan ramadan setan kena gari eh.. aku jelah yang malas ni. Hmmmm

Ok. Saya hanya perlu keluarkan isi hati saya yang tak tangible ini supaya ada sedikit kelegaan. Peduliklah kalau aku asek mengeluh je. Blog aku. Sukati akulah..

ps: anak aku dah bukak puasa.